You can read more of my stuff in my weekly column in the Windhoek Observer, www.observer.com.na. I write under the name: JW Asheeke.
With all the conventions and summits now being held in Namibia, I thought that it makes sense to let folks in on some things I have discovered since coming to live in Namibia.
First, check out a neat photo taken by my daughter, Martha:
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| This is the Independence Museum in Windhoek! Good-bye to the old style German Church representing colonialism as a 'brand' for Namibia! Hello to a 'brand' for a free Namibia! |
Many folks are here now for the COP 11 (UN Convention on Desertification - Conference of Parties) - more than 2000 delegates are here in WHK for that meeting, They are taking side trips and spending money all over the place! Hurray!
The Adventure Travel World Summit (ATWS) is next up in October! Whoopee! We are smokin' here in Namibia and gettin' good things done!
I will be writing an article about this issue in my monthly travel and tourism piece in the INSIGHT MAGAZINE, www.insight.com.na that should be out by October 11th.
Now, on to the "Jackie-tips"....
As an American married to a Namibian for 25 years, here are some of my discoveries. (These are only my personal observations.)
OK... take note: they call it ROBOTS, but we call it in the USA "traffic lights." I was shocked when I first heard someone giving me directions to drive somewhere and they said their house was just after 'the robots.' I got images of Wall-E or an old Star Trek episode.
Seasons are opposite. Winter here is summer in the USA and vice-verse. 'Winter' here is nothing really frosty; no ice storms; no snow. HOWEVER, on the dunes and in wide open spaces at night or in the early morning, it can be cold in the winter. So dress accordingly.
Swakopmund is seaside, but the water is ICY!!! There is no real ocean swimming like in Hawaii or in the summer at the Maryland shore. Google the Benguela Current and you will learn why.
Watch out for the 'ice-in-drinks' thing. In Namibia, asking for ice in your drink (particularly in the winter time) is like asking for someone to put salt on your ice cream. Ice in a drink means ONE cube; extra ice means TWO cubes. So, if you want real 'extra ice', just ask for a separate glass full 'to the top' (point to the top while you say this) with ice. Then you can serve yourself.
By the way... some places here put SUGAR on popcorn! Yuck; Sacrilege! So, be sure that you get the salt and butter you are expecting.
If you order 'bacon' here, it is really like fried sliced ham. What you want to say is "Streaky Bacon." Then, you'll get what we in the USA call 'bacon.'
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| For no reason except appreciation of beauty, I have added this photo of the Dunes in Namibia... sigh.... It doesn't go with my text per se, it's just so nice! It was taken by my friend Paul van Schalkwyk, a great photographer, who has a showing on October 2nd at the FNCC here in Windhoek |
Back on point -
Don't ask for the bathroom; ask for the toilet. It is crude for us in the USA to say that 'T-word', but it is clear and all know what you are looking for.
SLOW DOWN your English! Use the English you remember from school. No TV or Movie references please. They won't get it; the satellite connection to get some USA television series is expensive; most Namibians will not know any of those more popular shows.
Namibians are smarter than Americans in the language department. Each person you meet will speak at least 4 languages, sometimes as many as 6 or 7. If you have little clichés or idioms used in your speech while in the States, don't use them here. Namibians who can speak English are usually translating what you say literally. If you say: "Goodness, I am having a bad hair day!" - a Namibian may start looking at your hair style and wondering what's the problem.
People are socially conservative here in general. Watch the colorful curse words in your language and watch wearing clothes that are too revealing. They had thing going on here to arrest young ladies wearing mini-skirts!
Sorry to say this but, many Namibians are homophobes. Openly gay people can be called "moffies" (or worse) and could be victimized; they are definitely scorned. Same sex couples who are openly affectionate in public will likely offend most Namibians. Just be aware of the narrow-mindedness in Namibia on this issue.
Pancakes and Flapjacks here are really crepes. The Hilton in Windhoek serves pancakes Ihop style as does a cute little café called "The Joy of Food." But, their maple syrup here is total 'wannabe.' No Aunt Jemima's or Log Cabin here; no real 'maple' either unless you buy your own (for as much as USD$12! for a small bottle!) at a specialty store.
Neighbor is Neighbour and litre is liter. Remember your metric system here.. no pounds; there are kilos! The center is the centre. Got it?
On cars - don't follow the driver to his/her side of the car to get in. They drive on the other side here.
Watch out if you are driving yourself. For the first few seconds you feel like you want to do what you at home. If you do, you will be on the wrong side of the road. I did that myself several times when I first came to live in Windhoek.
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| Photo is from my friends Scott and Judy Hurd |
Focus...if you follow the other cars, you should be ok with your driving until you get used to things.
But, as you walk on the street, you will find yourself looking for oncoming cars the WRONG WAY!!! You will look left for cars as you try to cross, but the oncoming cars are actually to the right. Rather, look both ways when crossing the street, no matter what.
But, as you walk on the street, you will find yourself looking for oncoming cars the WRONG WAY!!! You will look left for cars as you try to cross, but the oncoming cars are actually to the right. Rather, look both ways when crossing the street, no matter what.
Taxis here are outrageous just like everywhere else I've lived in this world; they don't care about road rules; so brace yourself.
OK - The USA is a far more dangerous and rough place for crime than Namibia is. Here, there is opportunistic, petty crime. The bad boys here are not the crack-heads just walking up to people and shooting them to get money or gang-bangers in a turf war or someone going 'postal' in the workplace. There are no terrorist groups, violent religious extremists or civil war in Namibia; Thank God; so, no bombs, no kidnappings, no pirates, just petty theft.
There is no consistent or overt anti-American sentiment here, mostly people are fascinated with Americans and our accents when we speak. When someone is staring at your mouth while you talk and they are smiling, that is what is going on. Generally speaking, Namibians like Obama and they view Americans positively for that. There may be a comment about Americans as war-mongers, but that has happened only a few times to me.
Pickpockets are active here, but they are clumsy; you will see them coming. They aren't the smooth slick ones that we have in the States that work in gangs where one distracts you while the other with slim fingers lifts your wallet (or purse) smoothly from behind you. Here, snatch-and-grab of a handbag can (and does) happen, but again... it's clumsy (but effective!) You can see them coming, if you are alert! But, if they see you are alert; they will avoid you!
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| Be alert and focused! |
If you have your camera hanging around your neck and you are dippy and distracted; you are a target. If you have your fancy smart phone pressed to your ear while in crowds or you are walking and texting, you are a target. If you leave your wallet bulging in your back pocket, you are a target. If you leave your handbag open while walking on the street, you are a target. If you leave your hotel room unlocked; you are a target. If you get drunk and walk around alone on the streets at night; you are a target.
Don't walk around with headphones or earbuds in. STAY ALERT to all sights and sounds that are going on around you and you'll be fine.
Don't walk around ALONE in the night. That's common sense anywhere; you wouldn't do it at home, so, don't do it here either.
Don't use an ATM machine at night. Plan your money needs so that you get money as infrequently as possible. There are ATM machine scam artists in the cities here in Namibia - so be forewarned.
If someone crowds you at the ATM machine or starts talking to you (while you are using the machine!) either warn them off with a sharp, hard word (don't take your eyes off the machine or your wallet/handbag while you are speaking) or cancel the transaction and go elsewhere. Even if Jesus Christ or Denzel Washington is in line behind you, don't get distracted and never take your eyes off your card, the cash coming out or your wallet/bag.
Never, ever let anyone 'help' you with the ATM machine. You know how to use an ATM; they are all the same worldwide; you don't need any help. If anything screwy happens, cancel and go elsewhere. Best to go in pairs to the machine; one of you is working the machine; the other is back-to-back preventing anyone from getting close and watching everyone who is watching you.
Never, ever let anyone 'help' you with the ATM machine. You know how to use an ATM; they are all the same worldwide; you don't need any help. If anything screwy happens, cancel and go elsewhere. Best to go in pairs to the machine; one of you is working the machine; the other is back-to-back preventing anyone from getting close and watching everyone who is watching you.
Once you get your money from the ATM, put it away immediately! Move fast; don't linger. Don't count it out! Don't stand there and divide it up between you and your friends! Walk away from the ATM like the devil himself is behind you. As a foreigner, you are being watched the second you go to any ATM.
Don't leave any valuables in plain sight in the car. If you leave your laptop, ipad, smart phone, kindle or whatever on the seat of a car, it will likely be stolen.
Card cloning is a problem here and tourists are the target. Don't ever, never, ever let your credit card or bank card out of your personal sight. I don't care how nice and friendly the waiter or waitress is and how much they smile and make you feel special, follow your card like you would follow your infant child if someone else is carrying him/her.
If you are buying souvenirs and trinkets on the street, watch your back. Break your cash notes up and carry them in different places on your person. For example, put maybe N$100 in small bills in a pocket on the left, maybe N$200 in only N$50 notes in a slot in your handbag and maybe N$200 in a whole note in your front breast pocket. Mix it up!
The workers don't expect much 'tipping' in restaurants here; sadly, local people don't usually tip or if they do, it's small coins only! But, I always give 10%; if someone helps me carry things, it is N$10. If you are a large group (more than 8 people) at a table or bar, think about 15%.
The negative things I have noted above are, thankfully, not usual occurrences, but they do happen.
Seriously, Namibia is a safe place. Just don't paint a zero on your own back by being unaware, lost, disorganized, silly and dippy. Focus and act with common sense and you will definitely enjoy your time here. If you don't do things a certain way at home; then don't do it in Namibia either! that is the best rule to go by. Namibia is not Utopia or dream place; it is a wonderful, safe holiday location, full of people just like anywhere else. People are people - don't forget that and use your common sense and you'll be just fine.
Take charge of your holiday and plan to have fun!
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| This guy is taking charge of his day! No one is raining on his parade THX to Scott and Judy Hurd for the pix! |
Holidays in Namibia are a once-in-a-life-time experience. Don't let anyone rain on your parade.
If you do come, prepare for the best holiday or meeting or conference that you'll ever have and,
Tell'm Jackie Sent Ya'
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